Strength in Vulnerability
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Two Way Street... Feedback
As leaders, we define feedback as constructive information shared to guide improvement or reinforce effective actions. Most of us would say we’re good at delivering it, right? But now flip the dynamic. Same definition, same expectation—except now, the constructive information is coming from your team. Still feel the same way?
Set the org chart aside for a moment and take an honest look at how feedback flows in both directions.
As leaders, we use feedback to coach, develop, and provide insight. We observe, identify opportunities, and share them with our teams. While the information itself matters, the way we deliver it often determines whether it inspires growth or creates resistance.
Most of us understand that and take it seriously. But if we truly believe feedback drives growth, we have to ask ourselves an uncomfortable question: Do we welcome it with the same openness when it comes from our teams?
Creating space for feedback is not simply asking your team “what feedback do you have for me?” It requires open dialogue, transparency, and objective communication. When asking for feedback, be specific. Name the area you want input on, state your learning goal, and follow through on what you hear. Here’s what that looks like in practice:
“What’s one item from today’s staff meeting that you feel we should spend more time on? I want to make sure we’re dedicating the right attention to what matters most to you all. Can you give me an example of how addressing that would impact our future meetings?”
That’s the difference between checking a box and actually building a culture of feedback.
As leaders, it’s our responsibility to set the tone and show our teams that their input isn’t just welcomed—it’s needed. Without their perspective, root causes often go unidentified and unresolved. The right environment gives people the confidence to speak up without fear of judgment. And when they do, recognize it, reward it, and make it visible.
One of my favorite videos includes a conversation between Trevor Noah and Simon Sinek where they break down the difference between kindness and niceness. Kindness is doing what actually helps someone, even if it is uncomfortable. Niceness is avoiding discomfort to keep the conversation pleasant. That distinction is everything when it comes to feedback.
We need to be kind — which means being objective, even when what needs to be said is uncomfortable. Here’s what that looks like:
“Great job leading our quarterly ops review today. I want to help you sound even more confident in your delivery. Between sentences, you said ‘umm’ quite a bit — and that can unintentionally read as a lack of confidence. Let’s work together on some techniques to sharpen that before the next one.”
Yes, we’re calling it out the word that makes everyone cringe during presentations. But the delivery is tailored to help them grow, not to embarrass them. That’s the distinction. That’s kindness over niceness.
The care we put into delivering feedback should be matched by the openness we bring to receiving it. Leadership isn’t measured only by how well we coach others—it’s also measured by how willing we are to learn from the people we lead. Match the energy you bring to giving feedback with the humility to welcome it in return. Feedback is a two-way street.
Medina Leadership Consulting partners with organizations to develop confident, accountable leaders through our methodology: The Leadership Pact.
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